The complicated naming
of COVID-19 variants

The good old reliable Greek alphabet offers a solution

By Byron Toben

August 5, 2021

In an earlier column, as COVID-19 variants emerged with complicated alpha-numeric names, I half-jokingly suggested easier to remember names, such as various baseball pitches.

Since then, organized science has solved this problem by invoking the good old reliable Greek alphabet. T’were I of a Trump mentality, I would claim that I initiated this progress, but I’m not, so I’m not.

Mosaic depicting Jesus with Alpha and Omega symbols – Image Public domain

So far, this method has resulted in naming four variants – Alpha, Beta, Gamma and Delta.

I pray that there won’t be more, but should there be, the Greek alphabet has 20 more letters in reserve. Astound your friends by memorizing these and rattling them off. In order, starting with the fifth, they are Epsilon, Zeta, Eta, Theta, Iota, Kappa, Lamda, Mu, Nu, Xi, Omicron, Pi, Rho, Sigma, Tau, Upsilon, Phi, Chi, Psi and Omega.

Should these 24 not be enough, I suppose that namers could just double up – Mu Nu sounds cute.

However, two combos would meet resistance – too revered to be associated with a disease. Alpha Omega belongs exclusively to Jesus Christ, as stated in the Book of Revelations.

The Sweetheart of Sigma Chi is the most popular college fraternity song ever.

And on that note, let’s end with Dean Martin crooning that famous tune:

Feature image: Jonathunder, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

More articles from Byron Toben

Byron Toben, a past president of The Montreal Press Club, has been WestmountMag.ca’s theatre reviewer since July 2015. Previously, he wrote for since terminated web sites Rover Arts and Charlebois Post, print weekly The Downtowner and print monthly The Senior Times. He also is an expert consultant on U.S. work permits for Canadians.