The time of year to be grateful

Friendships and good health are the best of holiday gifts

By Irwin Rapoport

December 18, 2025

Winter arrived early this December, and despite the snow and freezing temperatures, I suspect many of us are only feeling the holiday spirit now as the Christmas Eve countdown has begun. Nor has the nonstop news cycle slowed, be it local, regional, national, or international. Whether it is the daily dose of insanity, madness, and inhumanity emanating from the mind of American President Donald Trump and his sycophant enablers or the horrible events abroad and close to home that bring a halt to any feeling of joy and happiness.

Hanukkah began last Sunday. What should have been a joyous celebration on the first night of the eight-day holiday at an annual beach party at Sydney’s Bondi Beach turned into a tragedy as 15 people were murdered. Dozens were wounded by a father and son duo who not only traumatized the thousands of people, but millions across the planet who saw the footage of those fleeing. There was no rhyme or reason for this mass shooting, and the motivations of the gunmen, of whom one is still alive, will never be fully explained. They lost their minds months ago, as did the shooter who terrorized the students at Brown University.

The Australian massacre was devastating and downright depressing. The death toll would have been higher had it not been for the courage of Soon Al Ahmed, a Syrian-Australian who risked his life by disarming one of the attackers. What could have been another divisive moment, pitching Jews against Muslims, was avoided courtesy of a Muslim/Arab father of two, who selflessly threw himself into the fray and, by doing so, sustained grievous wounds. Al Ahmed’s moment of clarity united a nation and showed the world that ordinary people are capable of becoming everyday heroes and that we are all one family.

An Associated Press article highlights the man for whom so many owe their lives. We are all capable of great deeds, large and small, and are grateful when these people step up to the plate. They serve as beacons of hope and highlight the qualities that can and should be emulated daily.

We are all capable of great deeds, large and small, and are grateful when these people step up to the plate. They serve as beacons of hope and highlight the qualities that can and should be emulated daily.

I received an early holiday gift on October 3/4 when the attentive staff at the Montreal General Hospital’s emergency room discovered that I had a large (thankfully benign) tumour/mass growing in my head. It was pressing on my optic nerves and pituitary gland. An operation was required to remove it, and between October 8 and 17, I was wonderfully looked after by the nurses and staff on Ward 4 North of the Montreal Neurological Hospital. A brilliant surgical team led by Dr. Marc Tewfik and Dr. Denis Sirhan, including surgeons from the Royal Victoria Hospital’s ENT clinic and the Neuro, successfully removed the tumour in a six-hour operation on October 14.

It was a well-oiled team of hundreds who saved my life, cared for me from start to finish, and continue to do so through ongoing aftercare. For them, it was and still is just another day at the office. This was my first and hopefully last major operation, but following it, I realized that I was not alone in this experience. If I can speak for everyone who received such critical and timely care, let me say thank you and wish everyone on the medical frontlines a Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year.

I will be writing an article about my medical adventure in the new year, and it is a whale of a tale.

My first holiday article in Westmount Magazine, This year consider the gift of reading, was published on December 15, 2021, and it has grown in scope and depth since. I stand by books as my go-to gift choice, and reading remains an immense pleasure. So please consider books as a part of your holiday shopping and support our bookshops, especially the local ones dotting our communities. Unfortunately, they are becoming increasingly rare sights. Nor can you go wrong by shopping at our many local businesses, who also face daily struggles, particularly excessive rent increases.

When awakened in the operating room, I proclaimed that “I can see,” “I’m alive,” and “thank you.” After responding to the doctors’ questions and asking a few of my own to learn more about the procedure, I sang to myself for what appeared to be thirty minutes. The first song was Bad Case of Loving You, a favourite tune I know by heart. I was elated to be alive. I have to admit that, despite being confident of the outcome, I was scared and feared my sight would be lost or significantly impaired. My first glimpses were of the surgical team in the brightly lit operating room, and I can assert that my vision had immediately improved.

On December 15, I received a second excellent gift thanks to the McGill Academic Eye Centre in NDG. When they compared the images of my eyes taken on October 6 and on that day, the impact of the tumour on my left eye, which had seriously compromised my left peripheral vision, had significantly disappeared. My right eye was impacted to a lesser extent, and it was healing. The damage from the pressure was not permanent.

It goes without saying that my appreciation for my family and friends grew, much like the Grinch’s, whose heart grew three times in size when he discovered the true meaning of Christmas in the classic holiday animated feature The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.

‘I had no idea of the extent to which I was loved and appreciated. This, and having a second chapter in life, is a tremendous gift and one that I treasure.’

I had no idea of the extent to which I was loved and appreciated. This, and having a second chapter in life, is a tremendous gift and one that I treasure. One of Aesop’s fables, Socrates and His Friends, dealt with friendship, and it goes this way:

Socrates once built a house, and everybody who saw it had something or other to say against it. “What a front!” said one. “What an inside!” said another. “What rooms! not big enough to turn round in, said a third. “Small as it is,” answered Socrates, “I wish I had true friends enough to fill it.”

By the way, S.A. Handford, whose translation of Caesar’s Gallic War is stellar, also translated a selection of Aesop’s Fables for Penguin Classics. The 1964 translation, now out of print, is brilliant, along with the illustrations that enhance the wisdom and common sense it conveys.

A gift, be it for a birthday or the holidays, reflects the value you place on the important people in your life, the ones you can depend upon through thick and thin, and make life worth living. There are libraries full of books, poems, and articles on friendship, and I would not dare to summarize the subject in so short a paragraph. Sometimes we take friendship and kindness for granted, expecting them to be there. Socrates’ words are timeless and should be heeded. Good friends are hard to find, and when you connect with them, cherish these relationships and tend to them.

As pointed out in previous holiday messages, take the time over the holidays to reach out to relatives and friends in person and by phone, and to send Christmas and holiday cards with meaningful messages and reminiscences.

A few days before my operation, when feeling terrified, I was speaking with George and Danka, friends I’ve known from high school and university days. We talked about my fears, including waking up in the middle of the operation, and recounted the highlights of our shared lives. At one point, we travelled back to a summer weekend at my family’s country home when they and seven or eight other good friends dropped by for the day. We had several small boats and decided to embark on a regatta. It had all the mayhem and silliness that you can imagine, and it was outstanding. We took a few bottles of wine with us, including a bottle of Dom Yago, a Spanish sparkling wine. Our destination was a small waterfall at the end of a small creek in an adjoining lake. As we progressed, one of the boats flipped over, and the Dom Yago fell to the bottom. Fortunately, it was not too deep, and after a few searches, the bottle was found. I triumphantly lifted it into the air, a large smile on my face. Our excursion was immediately dubbed “The Dom Yago Regatta,” and it became legend.

I had not thought about the event in years, but in the hospital room, I was reliving it fully, and the three of us were laughing. Even now, it brings a smile and a chuckle. And as the operation approached and the worst thoughts entered my mind, memories of the regatta cheered me up. I went into the operating room confident and ready for anything. Humour sustained me in those trying days.

Jon and Lucia visited me before the operation. We had not seen each other in a while, and many friends and relatives reached out to me by phone, including Sue and Daryl. Daryl, who underwent a few operations in recent years, reassured me that everything would be alright, and he was spot on. I must also mention Brenda and two or three other dear friends who were there for me – we spoke many times during my hospital stay, and they kept mutual friends informed of my condition and situation.

Family was there for me big time. My sister Ellen flew in from NYC. My aunt Merka and uncle Ernest dropped by, as did cousins Dara, Brian, and Felisha, and of course, my brother Ronald, who insisted that I go to the Montreal General Hospital to be checked out, was ever present.

‘It is also a time to reflect on the year that is ending – what it meant, how one fared, make sense of what we experienced, and, of course, be grateful to be alive.’

The next few days will be busy as we end the working year, shop for presents, prepare for holiday celebrations, and think of others in need by donating food, gifts, and money to organizations that support them. There is a great need for such support, and donations of any form are welcome.

It is also a time to reflect on the year that is ending – what it meant, how one fared, make sense of what we experienced, and, of course, be grateful to be alive.

The holiday season, while jolly and full of mirth, can be a lonely time for others. We can all pitch in to lift the spirits of those in need of compassion and hope. Let us do our part and inspire similar actions. The effect of a single good deed cannot be underestimated, and when multiplied, it is infectious, just like courage. Nor should these acts of generosity be limited to the Christmas season.

So, while there is a ton of depressing news and events swirling around us, take the time to put them aside and enjoy the festive season with family and friends. Renew the bonds of amity and have a good time. And speaking of good times, we’re in the midst of the Roman holiday Saturnalia. Life in the Roman Republic and Empire was no piece of cake. Midway through the second century AD, Rome experienced a series of frontier wars, an outbreak of plague that halved the empire’s estimated 50 million population, endless political turmoil which saw emperors be assassinated way too often, and a sustained decline in the quality of life. Saturnalia was a welcome annual respite.

Below is a brief description of this ancient holiday:

A common custom was the election of a “King of the Saturnalia”, who gave orders to people, which were followed and presided over the merrymaking. The gifts exchanged were usually gag gifts or small figurines made of wax or pottery known as sigillaria. The poet Catullus called it “the best of days.”

Seneca looked forward to the holiday, if somewhat tentatively, in a letter to a friend:

“It is now the month of December, when the greatest part of the city is in a bustle. Loose reins are given to public dissipation; everywhere you may hear the sound of great preparations, as if there were some real difference between the days devoted to Saturn and those for transacting business… Were you here, I would willingly confer with you as to the plan of our conduct; whether we should eve in our usual way, or, to avoid singularity, both take a better supper and throw off the toga.”

Allow me to wish everyone a Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year. I have much to be grateful for, especially this year, and I once again thank everyone who helped me survive a harrowing experience last October.

‘… while there is a ton of depressing news and events swirling around us, take the time to put them aside and enjoy the festive season with family and friends. Renew the bonds of amity and have a good time.’

Furthermore, thank you to Westmount Magazine’s editor, Pat Dumais, and publisher, Andrew Burlone, for allowing me to pen articles throughout the year. Nor would I leave out the people and organizations who made them possible via Q&As on the arts and matters of public concern.

Feature image: Pavel Danilyuk – Pexels

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Irwin Rapoport is a freelance journalist and community advocate from Westmount with bachelor’s degrees in History and Political Science from Concordia University. He writes extensively on local politics, education, and environmental issues, and promotes informed public discourse and local democracy through his writing and activism.