How to be in charge
of your life and career

Cultivate self-empowerment to take back control of your destiny

By Angela Civitella

Previously published in WestmountMag.ca

Discovering new territories, whether personal or professional, is an adventure that is both exciting and often intimidating. To successfully navigate these new horizons, it is crucial to build self-confidence and the skills needed to do so. This process of self-empowerment helps you regain control of your life, overcome obstacles, and turn challenges into opportunities. This article explores how to cultivate empowerment, even in the face of complex situations, by highlighting tools and techniques to shape your own destiny actively.

Whatever your personal challenges, you can always make choices that give you back control.

Have you ever felt like you had no control over your life and work? Perhaps you felt dominated by your colleagues or overwhelmed by job demands. Or maybe your time outside of work was devoted to others’ needs at the expense of your own? This feeling of powerlessness can be highly frustrating. But whatever your personal challenges, you can always make choices that give you back control. Understanding this is the essence of self-empowerment.

What is personal empowerment?

Self-empowerment means taking control of your own life by making positive decisions aligned with your desires. It is closely connected to qualities like self-esteem, but true empowerment happens when intention turns into concrete action.

This involves permitting yourself to succeed while recognizing that this journey is not a solo endeavour: it often requires the contribution, support, and advice of others. Moreover, achieving your goals usually depends on others’ trust, as well as access to resources, time, and autonomy. Therefore, self-empowerment balances personal initiative with collaboration—an active process of taking charge of your own destiny.

Keep in mind that self-empowerment means permitting yourself to succeed while recognizing that this journey is not a solo endeavor.

Remember, self-empowerment is not synonymous with entitlement. People who feel empowered do not expect benefits or privileges to be handed to them automatically; instead, they succeed through hard work, reflection, and cooperation.

What does personal empowerment feel like?

We all experience self-empowerment in different ways, depending on our personality and circumstances. Let’s consider an example: Two employees have worked as salespersons in a store for several years, yet neither has applied for a promotion, despite both having the skills and knowledge needed to advance. Do they feel empowered?

In the case of the first employee, the answer is yes. She enjoys her current role and deliberately declined a higher position because she did not want the added responsibility. However, she feels confident enough to apply again later if circumstances change.

Employee number two, however, feels intense frustration. He aspires to the pay and professional recognition that come with a promotion, but he is convinced his application would be rejected if he applied for a leadership role. This feeling of powerlessness paralyzes him, leaving him unable to change his situation. This creates a vicious cycle: a lack of opportunities to prove his abilities reduces his motivation and sense of self-empowerment. Consequently, his performance suffers, and he goes unnoticed by decision-makers who might otherwise offer him the promotion he desires.

How to achieve self-empowerment

Achieving self-empowerment can often feel like navigating through uncertainty, especially when you find yourself in a challenging situation similar to that of employee number two. The desire to feel stronger, more influential, and to make a meaningful impact is natural—but the path to getting there can seem unclear. To embark on this journey with confidence, consider embracing a structured four-step process designed to foster personal empowerment:

1. Know Yourself

Empowerment begins with self-awareness. When you feel powerless, your confidence and self-esteem often waver. Recognizing whether you perceive yourself as the master of your destiny or as a victim of external circumstances is crucial. This perspective shapes your mindset. By identifying your strengths and acknowledging areas for growth, you lay the foundation for a winning attitude. Taking stock of what you excel at—and what you could potentially master—can be deeply motivating. Emotional intelligence plays a key role here, and seeking guidance from a coach or counsellor can support you in this introspective work.

2. Identify Your Goals

Clarity about what matters most to you empowers you to create meaningful change. Focus on goals that align with your values and passions. Sometimes, this might mean negotiating flexibility or requesting adjustments that make your work more fulfilling. Knowing where you want to go fuels your motivation and guides your actions.

3. Develop Your Competencies

Waiting passively for opportunities or promotions is rarely effective. To truly empower yourself, proactively build the skills and qualities that will help you reach your goals. This might involve acquiring new capabilities or sharpening existing ones, including soft skills such as communication, tact, and initiative. Persistence and resilience are vital; keeping track of your progress helps you celebrate successes and learn from setbacks. Techniques like cognitive restructuring can help shift negative thought patterns and foster optimism. Engaging in physical activity and finding inspiring role models can also bolster your sense of empowerment.

4. Claim Your Space

Once you’ve laid the groundwork, take deliberate steps toward your ambitions. Start with small, manageable actions, then assess your progress and refine your approach. Seeking constructive feedback from trusted colleagues or mentors ensures you stay aligned with your path. Remember, empowerment involves making positive decisions and taking purposeful action that moves you closer to your desired outcomes.

In summary, personal empowerment is the confidence and control you cultivate over your life and work. It is an evolving process that requires self-knowledge, goal setting, skill development, and courageous action. Embracing these steps empowers you not only to navigate challenges but also to proactively shape your future.

Image: Bruce Mars

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